A relationship requires a certain level of commitment and obligation. When I say relationship, I’m not just considering romantic relationships with a boyfriend, partner or spouse, I’m considering all of the relationships possible in our lives.
It is the time of year when most of the world is caught up in planning, setting goals and deciding on a New Year’s resolution. These actions all sound very positive. Who could deny that joining a gym, attending a yoga class regularly, join a dating sight or making commitments to exercise more and eat less are bad things? Truth is they aren’t, but the way that you go about achieving these goals is what causes most of us to give up on these changes and revert back to your old habits.
Travel has taken me near and far. New experiences in 3 other countries. Moments of what seemed to be an emotional crisis. A rites of passage like no other through pregnancy and the mourning of a termination. A new declaration to my commitment to my service in the world through my work. A guest appearance on prime time Television show for my work as a Love and Relationship Expert. An up leveling to my business model. A shift into deepening relationship with my beloved partner.
Hugging, is it the sweet embrace we run away from or melt into it. Half way in, half way out. Today I was reminding how much I love hugging! Especially when two people have the ability to just be in the hug, breath together, be still together, laugh and drop into an open heart. However hugging seems so simple yet in society and possibly for many hugging is downright scary.
A practical human need is to give and receive touch, affection. It is showing up more and more how our Physiological and physical health benefit from these experiences. Yet what do you do when in a relationship where a partner is experiencing a low in life, on their personal path and needs something different then you need? You may feel a longing for touch, passion and the joy of ravishing each other to be shared.
I was having a conversation with a friend the other day about relationships. He was sharing about how relationships are so challenging and such work. I understood his perspective. I began to explain how many of us after the excitement of a new relationship starts to fade, the really juicy shadowy pieces come up. Our little girl and little boy , all the conditionings from upbringing and family start to surface.
I would like to share a story. A young boy was out skipping through the forest. In his hand he had the most precious of stones. He was singing, skipping, tossing the stone around in his hands. As he came upon a pristine lake he was in such awe, that he lost his footing and tripped over a stone. Suddenly that precious stone was sparkling through air as it flew out of his hands and soon was sinking to the bottom of the lake.
A common basic human need is to feel special for just about all human beings. In a relationships, there maybe edges which may feel uncomfortable, as well as exquisitely amazing. How are you unique in your relationship?
Pause for a moment before you out stretch your arms to grasp outside of yourself. See it is you which you have always been seeking. It is the moments we lose trust in our deep inner body wisdom that we reach so far outside our ourselves to find safety and comfort.
I speak often about going into the darkness, towards the fears, to offer up our presence to greater understanding through our emotions. This can sometimes feel like diving into the deep dark blue sea- unknown, mysterious and even scary. Today I literally went into the deep blue sea, to be present to my fears and listen to my body, while exploring an unknown world which I had never seen face to face like I did today.